Jan 15, 2011

A CDO Diagnosis Can Loosen Your Tongue

Guest Writer: Ruth Morse
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FINALLY!
I finally know what is wrong with me, thanks to one of the 783 catalogs we've received lately. The catalog sold a tee shirt that fit me to, well, a TEE!
It declared:
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I have CDO!!
What's that?
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CDO is OCD with the letters in the right order.*
-*remember the alphabetical spices
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With this in mind, I now feel free to share various and sundry (what is a sundry? who uses "sundry" in language anymore? Someone with CDO, I guess) totally unrelated thoughts with all of you! Such as:
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~ Don't ever do a job that you don't want to do for the rest of your life. I learned this gem from an older lady sitting next to me in the beauty shop last month. Her theory: unless you want to mow the lawn for the rest of your life, never, ever learn how to mow the lawn in the first place. She claims to have started her marriage with this philosophy and it worked. Never did mow the lawn. Never did fix her husband breakfast. She had a whole long list of things she had decided were NOT in that job description! She also aplied this motto to the work place. Don't know how she got away with it there, but this lady had the gusto to enforce it.
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~ Why do manufacturers put ridiculous instructions in their owner's manual? You all read the owner's manual from cover to cover, right? That's normal, right? It's normal if you have even a touch of CDO. I'm thinking of brilliant gems like this one found with the new toaster: never use in a bathtub. You're kidding, right? Or this one: We bought a child's kitchen set last month as a Christmas gift. It was made entirely of plastic. Plastic stove, plastic sink, plastic pots, plastic pans, plastic utensils. The maker of kitchen set did NOT want to take a chance that you would ignore the owner's manual. Right on the box, in big, bold letters: Pots, pans and utensils are NOT to be used in a real oven.
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Here's a biggie that has really been bothering me ever since I noticed IT.
~ Why do the buttons on a drive-up ATM have Braille on them? Anybody got the answer to that one? Please share your thoughts.
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...and one more thing......
uh, I'll get back to you when I remember it.
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The Cheap Senior Citizen is a Guest Writer who occasionally shares helpful hints she has learned through her experience.
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