Thursday, July 3

I Ate The Plum

( This is my daughter, not me, ain't she sumthin'?! )
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I had an out-of-body experience yesterday that today is freaking me out, really giving me the creeps.
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I was cruising the country roads in my daughter's pickup truck, listening to Billy Currington's Good Directions, thinking "this is where rednecks come from", windows open, dust flying. (I'm setting the scene here) I was transforming and getting into the swing of country girl, feeling almost young again. Feeling like maybe there will be a good looking cowboy selling turnip greens from his pickup truck, checking me out, just around the next bend. (control yourself)
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Suddenly a farmer's market loomed in front of me. Ooo la la. Fresh produce - wouldn't that go perfect with my dusty truck and country music? Not being able to locate the drive thru, I had to pull over.
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Recently, I've been converting my diet from junk food to fresh food (silly me), so the fruit and vegie thing appealed to me, but I was an alien in the farmer's market, I knew nothing. (Not true, I did recognize an apple.) (do you mind me talking to you in parenthesis?)
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The farmer recognized my confusion, slowly approached me and said something farmerish and twangy. Unfortunately, he was not the good looking cowboy the songs imply. He was the SC small town farmer-gone-old type. We struck up a conversation and I asked him about the very enticing plums in the awesome wicker baskets. I wanted to eat one, but I didn't know how. Does one eat the whole thing? Is there a huge hard lump in the middle to avoid? Does one peel it? He asked if I like them sweet or sour? How do I know, I never ate one. So he says, "eat a couple, see wucha like."
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Now? Here? In this dust and grime? Without paying for it? I stuttered, "Um, now? Don't I have to clean it first?" Visions of antibacterial bottles dancing in my head.
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He grabbed the plum from my hand, wiped it on the front of his grimy, SWEATY, dirty T-shirt, handed it back to me and said, "'At's how I do it. Now gawn and eat it."
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Here's where I had the out of body experience.
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I ate the plum.
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{{{{shudder}}}}} Are you hearing me? I ate the plum, skin and all, after it had a sweat bath from the man's T-shirt.
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I couldn't help it. I wasn't thinking clearly. I got caught up in the moment -- farm girl -- dusty pickup - fresh local grown food. It felt so good to just grab something and eat it -- not from a can off a shelf in an airconditioned superstore with out of control kids screaming and pierced, tattooed parents smacking them around or yelling at them instead of teaching them. How refreshing. Just dust, sunshine, fresh air and a fresh plum. Oh man, the juices ran down my cheeks, it was so awesome.
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It was one of those Utopian old-timey moments and I lost my head. I ate the plum. I still can't believe it. (PS, now I can't stop. I've eaten 8 more plums and have 4 more to go, but I wash them first) (I do so like them, Sam I am.)

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

Too many plums gives one a sore bum!

Tom Sliker said...

OK-- so if you like eating a plum "straight up" then you might want to try something with more protein. Click here to check out this video.

Renee said...

You can take the girl out of the city, but you can't take the city out of the girl! :)

David said...

Now that's livin' the good life.

Anonymous said...

My, ain't chewa city-sliker (get it?) Even I eat dirty fruit...Live a little, gal. Cause we're all dyin' anyway!

BTW, that can't be a pic of your daughter, unless you're not tellin' me about a 3rd...

dt

Poof said...

Yeah, DT, that IS too my daughter -- Patti. Tom took that picture. Hey, when are we gonna get those plums by your house? Afterdark tonight?

Don' nobody go talkin' about my bum. Aint nobody's bidness.

Poof said...

I watched Tom's protein vid, now I'm sick. That might be worse than sweat.

Denise said...

you go, girl

carolinaqt09 said...

Like mother, like daughter.
Today I was eating a watermelon at the softball game, and everybody was all crowded around & for once in my life I was tryin to be a lady... or atleast not gross people out.. but dang I had to give up and slurp that watermelon like it was nuthin. Juice runnin down my cheeks.. so cold, so liquidy... haha SICKO.

Poof said...

I'm so proud, my baby's coming along just fine. A mini me.