Hey, Pooter, Doncha Wanna Horse?

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This blog is temporarily shut down as we mourn the passing of

William

"Uncle Bill"

Masler.

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The last time Uncle Bill came down was the result of another one of his and Matt's great ideas. They heard that we got some horses so he called me up one day and said, "Pooter, don'cha want another horse? We have one nobody rides and we'd love to give her to you." This was in our early days of ranching and we didn't know nothin' about free horses, so I eagerly said "Yeah! Sure, bring her down." After he got my confirmation, he released the minor detail that it was a miniature horse, untamed, unruly, nobody in their right mind would want. (except maybe Marj)

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Before I could change my mind, Uncle Bill and Matt rigged up this cage on the back of their pick-up, coaxed that miniature hellion into it and drove non-stop 800 miles, arriving at my doorstep in just under 13 hours with Aunt Myra firmly lodged between them.

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They unloaded that sucker, gave me some feeding instructions and collapsed into bed. We had a sweet visit the next morning and by afternoon they were ready to head home.

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My heart is with you guys - mom and dad, Aunt Myra, Matt, Ronnie, Terry, Holly. I wish I could be there. When the pain lessens, I hope we can sit around and laugh over all the Uncle Bill stories.
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Moose, Bill, Marie, Shirley, Jerry

The Magic Meatball Never Lies

Rushing out the door to take Jennifer to the orthopedic dr., Eva called and asked me to stop by her house, she had a present for me. Once there, I found a huge box duct taped together with flowery stickers all over it. Inside was a heart pencil, a glue stick, an empty roll of scotch tape and Eva's prized magic meatball, kind of a magic eight ball which can answer all of life's biggest questions for you. I was floored. "The Magic Meatball? You're giving me the Magic Meatball?"
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There was a moment of reverence and then I tucked it carefully into my purse and trotted off. Eva sent a feel-good message for Jenn and a smiley sticker for her crutches and thus began our Magic Meatball Adventures.....

Redneck Bowling

To continue in my Redneck Series...... allow me to introduce

Redneck Bowling.

As with most Southern Redneck Sports, it starts with this sentence:
"We were settin' around the front porch with nothin' to do....."
(there's a Redneck misspelling in the narrative, too, ain't that somethin'?)

Alice in Wonderland, Disney 3D

Is it better to be feared or to be loved?

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Alice is back.
Or is she?
It seems as if Alice is back in Wonderland, oddly called Underland, but no one is quite sure if it's her. She is 19 now and all grown up; she herself is unclear whether her flashbacks are memories or nightmares. Was she the Alice that fell down the rabbit hole so many years ago before the evil Red Queen (magnificently played by Helena Bonham Carter "I need a pig here! I love a warm pig belly for my aching feet.") took the ruling crown from her sweet, lovely sister the White Queen (equally magnificent Anne Hathaway)? The wise catepillar declares her "hardly Alice," leaving them all thinking she's not their Alice, even Alice herself, who finally admits she is a weaker Alice, a shy, timid, frightened Alice, admiting "I'm not much lately, I used to be much muchier" until the Mad Hatter pronounces her just "the right Alice" and everything changes." Johnny Depp plays the Mad Hatter with his typical flair. He is awesome. The sets, costumes, and animation in this film is totally amazing. I think Director Tim Burton sketched most of the wild looking characters straight from his imagination. Check out the photo stream at IMDb if you want to see the progression from sketch to actors to costume design.
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The 3-D effects were weak & didn't live up to my expectations, but the creativity made up for it. This was by far my favorite Alice in Wonderland.
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"Is it better to be feared or to be loved."
The movie had some quality themes that left many movie-goers thinking:

• good vs evil
• fear vs love
• a hypocritical life vs a sincere & true life
• live up to societal expectations or follow your passion

In this clip, you can see Anne (the white queen, on the left), Mia (Alice, in the middle) and Helena (the red queen, on the right) talk about playing their parts. Helena is married to (or living and having children with) Director Tim Burton.

More of My Gates/Seinfeld Fascination

I love the heinie shake at the end. I could repeat that little part all day long.

Bill Gates and Jerry Seinfeld Chillin in the Crib, Yo

Does anyone know why Bill and Jerry did these commercials?

Simon

When the kids were little, we went through a Simon phase. We played Simon all the time, with its little beeping noises driving the non-players insane, until one day we put it away and forgot all about it. Fast forward 15 years to when Eva came over and for some odd reason I wanted to introduce her to Simon. We dug him out, blew off the dust, changed all the batteries (2 D and 1 9-volt) and what-do-you-know, he played like a charm.



Simon, another Milton Bradley game, launched in 1978 along with the Susan B. Anthony silver dollar, Grease, Saturday Night Fever, and Ashton Kutcher. "Simon Says" a pattern by beeping and lighting up a series which the player memorizes and repeats, usually at a slower pace. Each time the player is successful, Simon adds another beep/color. Nobody has ever beat Simon. Ever.
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There are all kinds of versions of Simon out there now, even a mini keychain version. My version is called a collectible and goes for 90 bucks. Who knew? Eva tucked it under her arm and took it home with her. Patti said she won't stop playing it, even took it in the bathroom with her. Guess she's practicing up to beat Uncle Tommy.

Coffee Shop/Internet Cafe Comes to Town

Coffee Shop Ribbon Cutting Ceremony,

Pictured left to right:

Tim Skinner (Library Director), Dave Heffron (Town Councilman), Tyler Jones (Store Manager), Jimmy Jones (CCI Founder),

Ken Clark (CCI President)

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A Wi-Fi Coffee Shop came to town on a dreamy Spring day. We'd all been waiting for it, some of us more impatiently than others, and about fifty of us turned out for the ribbon cutting ceremony.

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"My life looked a lot like these old buildings before Jesus made a difference," began Jimmy Jones, President and Founder of Christ Central Ministries and Founder of Christ Central Institute. Jones told how the initial plans called for housing the library on the main campus across town, but the downward economy prevented that from happening. Then these run-down buildings became available and God seemed to lead the college in a different direction. Jones compared his restored life in Christ to the restoration that was done with these buildings, adding that "a lot of people need the same encouragement, just as we worked with these buildings." Christ Central walks the talk. While their buildings are restored with top quality work, it is the broken lives of people that they are most interested in restoring.
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The ribbon cutting ceremony for Christ Central's Research Library and Expressions Coffee Shop began with a prayer by Pastor Leroy Dodson and introduction by President Ken Clark. Clark explained the work that has been done in preparation for today's grand opening, years of going through the donated collections, cataloging 80,000 - 90,000 volumes and removing the duplicates. Clark also mentioned that the upstairs has been furnished as a men's dorm for students and faculty.

Founder Jimmy Jones then spoke, followed by Tim Skinner, the Research Library's Director. Skinner comes to us with three Master's Degrees and having worked previously at three Bible Colleges. (The first time I met Skinner, he was riding through town on his bicycle in his tweed coat and his top hat. I knew right then he would fit in this little town perfectly.) Skinner expressed his heart's desire to help students learn to navigate a research library properly.

Dave Heffron took the podium on behalf of Mayor Mike Miller, out due to illness. Heffron told how the town had mixed feelings when told of CCI's plans to build the coffee shop and library at this location. Feelings of disbelief coupled with excitement. Disbelief that these buildings could be restored, that a wi-fi coffee shop and a considerable research library could come to such a small town and excitement that if anyone could do it, CCI could. The town, said Heffron, is excited to have a place for people to socialize and relax, to sit and talk and use their laptops.

The final speaker for the day, in flip-flops and looking very cool, appealing to the young adults in our community, was store manager Tyler Jones. (the first time I met Tyler he was eating a hot dog on my back patio) Jones thanked us all for coming out and encouraged us to return with friends and laptops. He described the menu of beverages and sandwiches, the availability of 3 computers for public use, and the wi-fi internet service for those with a laptop. I later had the opportunity to ask Tyler what his favorite beverage is: Cafe Fraze'. "It's candy-like," he said, "coffee...sugar....a li'l chocolate..."

He had me with "chocolate." It was fabulous.

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The coffee shop opens for good on Saturday, March 20, 2010, 8:30 a.m. The library opens the same day, 10:00 a.m. Expressions Coffee Shop is located at #112 Park Ave and the Research Library is at #110 Park Ave. They are snuggled between Wagener Feed and Kwik Karry and they are across the street from Town Hall.

On That Cold, Cold Wet Week

The sun did not shine.

It was too wet to play.

So we sat in the house

All that cold, cold wet week.

I sat there with Eva.

We sat there, we two.

And I said, "How I wish

We had something to do!"

Too wet to go out

and too cold to play ball.

So we sat in the house.

We did nothing at all.

All we could do was to Sit!

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And we did not like it.

Not one little bit.

BUMP!

And then Something went BUMP!

How that bump made us jump!

We looked!

Then we saw him step in on the mat!

We looked!

And we saw him!

The Cat in the Hat!

And he said to us,

"Why do you sit there like that?"

"I know it is wet and the sun is not sunny. But we can have lots of good fun that is funny!"

"I know some good games we could play," Said the cat. "I know some new tricks," Said the Cat in the Hat. "A lot of good tricks. I will show them to you. -

Your mother will not mind at all if I do!"

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Being a Grandma is a lot like being the Cat in the Hat. We just pop in when things are dull and the mother's out and we spice things up a bit. The kid's never quite sure if she should do these things, but that darn cat is so persuasive "Now! Now! Have no fear. My tricks are not bad... we can have lots of good fun, if you wish...." for example... "with a game that I call Up-Up-Up with a fish!" You remember... the fish atop the umbrella atop the hat atop the cat atop the ball....

It's not that my I mean The Cat's ideas are necessarily bad.... just sometimes messy maybe
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Or a tadbit unhealthy perhaps

And sometimes a little frou frou or expensive

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And, hey, this was her very own idea...
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and the talking chins was just plain fun.
hours and hours of fun
(did I mention hours?)
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nothing. nothing going on here, keep moving
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Dr. Seuss was given a list of 400 words school children would be learning and was asked to write a book with his infamous illustrations that would use many of these words and "would be interesting for children." It took him nine months to produce The Cat in the Hat, using 223 words that were on the list and 13 that were not. Only one word - "another" - has three syllables, 14 have two syllables, the rest have only one syllable.

And Dr. Seuss' real name? Theodor Geisel
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The other day I texted Marj:

"Would you still love me if my name was Bernhard Schlink?"

(he's an author) (sorry, Mr. Schlink) (her answer was "definitely")

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So I guess what I'm sayin' is:
Would you still love me if my name was Theodor Geisel?

SC: Columbia, Specialty Foods

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Just thought I'd give a quick shout-out to some of my favorite Columbia, SC food joints.
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1. Cupcake. 1213 Lincoln St., Columbia, SC 29201 (803) 212-4949 "How can you possibly choose?" They offer 9 different flavors per day. In Columbia on Wednesday? Creamsicle. Friday? Rocky Road. Saturday, darlin', Saturday is Double Chocolate Lemon. But actually, my favorite remains Red Velvet.
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2. Vellas. This picture isn't Vellas, of course, it's my other favorite place, but I want to talk about Vellas. 829 Knox Abbott Drive, Cayce. 803.796.4629. Tom introduced me to Vellas back in our college days circa 1984. The only thing I've eaten at Vella's is steak. Their steak is great. They aren't a chain, don't have fancy theme style diggs, just plain and simple Vellas. They are known for their ribs and burgers, too. And they now have a special Crab Legs night, check it out.
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3. Goatfeathers. 2017 Devine St., Columbia, SC 29205. 803.256.3325 It's a coffee bar in 5 Points. Now let me say: if I want a coffee bar in 5 Points, I'll go to Starbucks right around the corner. But Goatfeathers is nice if you want something different, ecclectic, artsy, dark, and if you want something, oh say, sweet, like cheesecake. They usually have a few different flavors available and I prefer the white chocolate raspberry.
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4. Village Idiot. Also in 5 Points, almost next door to Goatfeathers. How convenient is that?! I've been an Idiot since my college days in 1983,4,5.... This is some great NY Style Pizza. You have to climb a narrow, dark spiral staircase to get up there, and once there, try not to use the restrooms. Oh, and wear jeans, nothing fancy. Dark, rowdy, sticky, but excellent pizza and fun. Wanna feel like a college kid again? Go here. (and you can follow 'em on twitter @IdiotPizza.
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There's a bazillion more places I'd like to recommend, maybe I'll have a weekly spotlight blog.... I'll think about that.
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Oh, and if you go to these places, call me. I can meet you there!


Honorable Mentions:
Groucho's Deli, Yesterday's, Zestos (burgers, ice cream), Rockaway Athletic Ctr. (best burger in town), Blue Marlin (seafood).

America's Most Unusual Hotels

Thanks to an alert reader for bringing this to my attention.
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If you'd like an "atypical stay" in a "quirky hotel," (yes! yes I would!) you can find it in Unusal Hotels of the World, a book by Steve Dobson.

• Want to sleep in a tree house?
• Want to scuba dive to your room way down under the sea?
• Or my favorite: a castle.

America's most unusual hotels introduces you to these and more at Unusual Hotels of the World.

Attitude is Everything

An alert reader sent in this snappy email thread to remind us all that

"Attitude is everything." Praise God every day for the life He has given you, in Him is life; He will renew your life and sustain you in your old age.

and besides....... "a merry heart does good like a medicine."

There once was a woman who woke up one morning, looked in the mirror, and noticed she had only three hairs on her head. "Well," she said, "I think I'll braid my hair today." So she did and she had a wonderful day.

The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and saw that she had only two hairs on her head. "H-M-M," she said, "I think I'll part my hair down the middle today."? So she did and she had a grand day.

The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and noticed that she had only one hair on her head. "Well," she said, "Today I'm going to wear my hair in a ponytail." So she did and she had a fun, fun day.

The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and noticed that there wasn't a single hair on her head. "YEAH!" she exclaimed, "I don't have to fix my hair today!"

Giant Seagull Found, Remnant from Jurassic Period?

Happy 40th, Cousin David!

It all goes downhill from here, buddy.

Here's Cousin David back in the day:

Happy 40th Birthday, Cousin David. Hope you get some time off soon to party a little.

If you haven't been following the blog long, click on Cousin David's name (each one) to learn more about Cousin David.

Driving Miss Eva and Miss Emma

If you're computer's like mine, let this sit and upload for a few minutes before you try to play it so it'll be smooth viewing.

This Just In: Handy Tip #232

Thanks to an alert reader for sending this in.
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As I age, plan out my retirement and living off social security, like most old folks, I get more frugal. I have a growing dismay over not being able to get every last crumb out of the potato chip bag. An alert reader sent me an Old Geazer chart that defined those crumbs as "micro chips:"
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"Yes, exactly!" I said, "I need to get those micro-chips, they could save me a lot of money." She was quick to respond to my need with the following helpful hint:

• Take one pair of scissors
• Cut down the sides of the bag
• Lick what is left in the bag bottom

Oh, she's good.

Blogging Basics: Vlogging Part III

The final part in my series on vlogging is short and sweet, the web's biggest kept secret: the best and easiest way to improve your videos is through Angles.

The 5 basic angles:

1. Close up action shot – Answers the question of What is going on?

2. Face Shot – Answers the question of Who is that?

3. Wide Angle Shot – answers the question of Where is this happening?

4. Over the Shoulder Shot – answers the question of What does this person see?

5. Side Shot (a close version of wide angle shot) – answers the question of Is there anything else going on?

And that's it, my friends. A few simple and easy steps for Vlogging. Now grab a coffee and start planning your first video blog. Then link me to it, I wanna see!

Huge, huge thanks to the speakers at the Blissdom Wisdom Workshop:

This is the third of a three part series on Vlogging, lessons I learned at the Blissdom Conference in a session brought by the following: Esther Crawford @faintstarlite, Audrey McClelland @AudreyMcClellan, Jo-Lynne Shane@dcrmom, Danielle Smith @ExtraordMommy,@jendisjournal Jendi Pagano

Blogging Basics: Vlogging, Part II

This is part two of a three part series about video blogging, information I gathered from Blissdom '10 Conference. Speakers are credited and linked at the end. Disclaimer: While I learned all these nice tips, I sure haven't put them into practice yet. Don't let my vlogging skills prevent you from benefitting from the following advice.

8 rules to vlog by:

1. Plan ahead: use notes or an outline to stay on point. Practice a few times.

2. Keep the camera steady.

   • If you pan around, it will look like a bad home video (it's first sign of a low quality video)
   • use a tripod or lean against something.
   • too much motion makes footage unwatchable

3. Audio can make or break you – use an external mic (lapel mic less than $50 if your camera has capability for it) flip doesn't have it - be within 5' of the camera if you have no mic. Make sure the room isn't empty, empty rooms echo.

4. Pay attention to lighting - use natural daylight when possible. Set up lights if needed, make sure its not blinding you or creating creepy shadows. Make sure light is towards your face, dont' be back lit with light behind you causing you to become a shadow. Inside? Be close to windows.

5. Location, location! - don't go up against a blank wall. Put something interesting behind you. Declutter the background! Change it up, don't have the same background for each video, use a green screen – get permission for photos you put up though.

6. Show or demonstrate what you are saying – cut to relevant footage or photos, use props. This keeps people's attention.

7. Be yourself. Pretend the camera is a friend you like to gossip with, look up slightly, it's more flattering. Enhance emotional response – show lots of energy and passion (pick topics you have passion for and it'll show) . Have your husband/friend view and critque – does the video convey the real me? You want to sell yourself, not a fake image.

8. Keep it short. The sweet spot for attention is 2 minutes.

By the way, if you're like me and Not camera ready? Use voice over, film someone else, do a slideshow or stop motion, video screen captures (you can even interview via skype by using a program to record the video conversation – there are a couple of options about $15)

This is the second of a three part series on Vlogging, lessons I learned at the Blissdom Conference in a session brought by the following: Esther Crawford @faintstarlite, Audrey McClelland @AudreyMcClellan, Jo-Lynne Shane@dcrmom, Danielle Smith @ExtraordMommy,@jendisjournal Jendi Pagano

The Game of Life

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I think we're all familiar with the game of Life. Eva played for the first time the other night and she loved it. Eva's only 4, so we didn't get into all the nitty, gritty details that make the game last for days. She loved picking out the people and stuffing them in the cars and driving over the hills and past the church. She loved payday. She hated the car wreck that took all her money and threw one of her girls out the back window.
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Here's something that I think will surprise you: Milton Bradley produced the game in 1860 as "The Checkered Game of Life." Abraham Lincoln could have played the same game I just played last night. Isn't that freaky?

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When SC seceded from the Union? Someone could have been playing Life.

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In the original game, a player could score extra points by reaching "Happy Old Age." That's been phased out of the newer versions.

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As indicated by the title, the game simulates real life as 1-6 players progress across the board by the spin of a dial. Eva went to college and became an Accountant and later purchased a lovely Dutch Colonial. I ended up with a beach house and Patti, poor thing, purchased a Split Level right on a fault line that made the house literally split. Cost her a fortune, but it was fun to hear Eva say, "Awww, mama got a crappy house." Not sure I've ever heard Eva say "crappy" before.

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Ironically, I wrote a Great American Novel. Patti won a Humanitarian Award and Eva invented a new flavor of ice-cream. I started to think this game had ouija game powers or something - how'd it nail us like that? But then I climbed Mt. Everest. Like that would ever happen. Stupid game.

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When I was young, the game ended when all players reached the Day of Reckoning which always scared me, it sounded too much like The Rapture or The Judgement Seat. At the Day of Reckoning mom and dad would gather all our crap and after five hours of bookkeeping and calculating, 3 cups of coffee and usually two arguments, they would declare a winner and hide the game in a really good spot so we wouldn't find it for another five years. On the Day of Reckoning, each player would be placed at "Millionaire's Acre" or "The Poor Farm." Just like they did away with "Happy Old Age," they did away with "The Poor Farm" in later versions and now you can either retire at "Millionaire Estates" or "Countryside Acres."

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... and somewhere along the way "Share the Wealth" cards were added. I think it was around the time Obama was elected.

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In the interest of full disclosure: If you click the game below and purchase it, I get a t-tiny bit of money, something like 2 or 3 cents, not enough to get me to Millionaire Acres, but maybe, eventually, enough to keep me out of "The Poor Farm."

Blogging Basics: Vlogging, Part I

So you've been blogging awhile and you want to venture into vlogging – video blogging – maybe to demonstrate a skill you're addressing or maybe to boost your SEO. More people will watch a short video than read a short or long blogpost. 52% of viewers take action after watching a video. Yeah. That's pretty impressive. Also? Most viewers have a two minute attention span. Ouch.
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Before you begin, here are some things to think about.

Hardware:

• What is your price point?

• Is your desired use indoor/outdoor, low lighting?

• How will it be viewed? HD SD?

• What kind of storage do you want to deal with -- SD cards, hard drives, tapes...

• Tapeless camcorders advice: stay away from the ones with movable parts, use ones with flash ram built in

• What acc/attachments will you need to improve? -- Lense, shotgun mic, etc.

Software:

• What are your system limitations, memory?

• What is your price point? (One of the session speakers said "I hate to sound like your mother, but price really is a consideration.")

• How fancy will you edit? You may require expensive editing software or you may be able to use the free stuff.
  

• Keep in mind your end game – selling videos usually requires HD exporting capabilities.

• Start with windows movie maker cause it's free.
  

Hosting:

• vimeo

• blip tv

• viddler

• momtv

• tubemogul

• youtube

Copyright Issues:

1. Be careful with music. Youtube sometimes won't let you put video up if you're using copyrighted music. Just crediting the music doesn't make it legal. Look for royalty free. Some songs you can download if you give them credit.
   

2. Locations – get managers of restaurants, etc. to sign release. Sometimes you need individuals to sign a release.
   

3. TV

4. Live concert videos

5. Movies and trailers

6. Commercials

7. Photos

This is the first of a three part series on Vlogging, lessons I learned at the Blissdom Conference in a session brought by the following: Esther Crawford @faintstarlite, Audrey McClelland @AudreyMcClellan, Jo-Lynne Shane@dcrmom, Danielle Smith @ExtraordMommy, Jendi Pagano @jendisjournal

Sandlapper Enduro

60 miles of sand and tall pines, 300 riders averaging 24 mph without much trail to speak of. That's what we call fun. I'm over here today, enjoy the video and read more over there should you so desire, you sweet little thing, you.